Miracles of El Duce

While on the planet, El Duce performed several miracles. This have been recorded in the annals of the Church of El Duce and have been authenticated by the Pope of The Church of El Duce, Dr. Heathen Scum.

These documented miracles are :

i) Turned wine into Kessler Whiskey. This was done by Duce for other panhandlers on Hollywood Blvd. to drink when they ran out of money and wanted to get fucked up. Duce stated to the assembled faithful, "Jesus turned water into wine. I am way more rockin than that. Wine at most have 15 per cent alcohol in it. My whiskey is 100 proof. This stuff will really get you fucked up good."

ii) Invented Rape Rock

iii) Hypnotized uptight sluts into "kicking down" their pussy to the band and the road crew

iv) managed to avoid arrest in several incidents

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